The Night the Animals Talked (1970)

The makers of this special very clearly wanted to tell us something and were very worried we might miss it so decided to spend every single moment of this special repeating it over and over in very small words to make as sure as possible that we could not have missed it.  Which is a shame because while they keep saying it over and over and underlining it again and again the message never actually comes together because what they think they’re saying is so very, very undermined by everything else.

The title screen promises madness and it does not lie.

This is another special that laser-focuses on a part of the nativity scene other than the Baby Jeebs.  Instead of a drummer boy or the wise men or the shepherds it focuses on the animals.  There’s an entire field of study on the historical depictions of the animals in the manger scene, from their pastoral imagery to the way they emphasize the humble nature of the scene, how various cultures at various times chose to either include or omit certain animals, the implications this had for the economic status of both the artists and the intended audiences, but the important part here is they are traditionally passive observers to the birth as after all they are just animals.

The conceit of this special is that, for no actual stated reason, the animals are granted the power of speech for the night of the nativity.  It’s unstated but they’re also granted the power of conscious thought, as one isn’t very useful without the other, but there’s a special emphasis placed on the speech itself, both in songs and at the climax.  What’s odd is that although it’s very explicit that the animals are given the gift of human speech, and it is specifically human speech, at no point do they ever talk to a human.  Nor is a human ever depicted on screen, not even the Baby Jeebs.  So within the logic of the special there is no actual reason for the animals to be able to talk as the humans do, yet a great deal of attention is paid to the fact that this is what they’re doing.  In animation animals talking to each other but becoming mute around humans is very common and doesn’t require any explanation so it’s notable that this is exactly what doesn’t happen.

The point the makers seem to think they’re making is that animals are better than humans because they’re not as mean and petty as we are and once given the gift of speech they start acting like humans, much to their dismay, and wouldn’t it be better if we all acted like them in their simple wisdom.  Which … doesn’t make any sense?  I mean it doesn’t make sense in broader ethical terms, as we’ll get to, but it also doesn’t make sense within the logic of the story, as in the opening few minutes before the speechifying they’re shown acting territorial and adversarial to each other anyways, and after starting to talk they just make explicit what was implied through their actions before.  They aren’t models of good behavior before talking, aren’t during, and really only act better towards the end after being shamed for acting like humans, which as I said seems to be the moral but doesn’t follow from their behavior up to that point.  It also attempts to establish that it’s the talking itself that’s causing the bad behavior, which even if it was consistent with how they’d been portrayed at the beginning is a very odd message, that communication itself is the source of human conflict.

If there was a way the talking could have affected the plot it would be in the interaction between the animals and Mary and Joseph, but instead it’s all done with their donkey.  While the animals are still bickering between themselves the dog wanders out and comes across the party Jeebs.  He talks briefly to the donkey, which was either granted those same magic talking powers or it’s your typical ‘animals can talk to each other’ cartoon logic, which I will again point out is very directly what is not happening the rest of the time, then they head on back to the barn where the other animals make it very clear they are not interested in sharing.  They use some very on-the-nose terminology, such as not ‘assimilating’ and how ‘there’s no room for strangers,’ that sort of thing.  The party is turned away, which means in this telling there’s no interaction with an innkeeper, which also means that in the reality of Mary and Joseph their donkey led them to a random stable, brayed a bit at some noisy animals inside, then led them away again.  After being shamed the animals send some birds to go bring them back which somehow causes them to turn around again, which is again inexplicable from the point of view of Mary and Joseph.  Their donkey listened to some birds and went back to the stable?  They must’ve been really annoyed with their donkey.  Freakin’ Nestor.

What further causes the entire metaphor to collapse is the other animals’ treatment of the two pigs.  The animals bicker amongst themselves in the confines of the barn, the hens are mad at the rooster, the goat is annoyed with everyone, that sort of thing, but everyone can agree that the pigs are filthy and need to stay outside.  The pigs can talk like everyone else but even after the rest of the animals are shamed into allowing the Baby Jeebs and company into the barn they are excluded and have to sit outside feeling bad.  The special tries to get around this by having the other animals not reprimand them when they sneak into the barn to marvel at the glow from Baby Jeebs but they certainly weren’t invited in by the supposed goodly animals.

Then there’s the end of the special, which is where I throw up my hands entirely and just start guessing at what they meant to say.  After witnessing the birth of the Baby Jeebs the ox, who’s been acting as the animals’ conscience and variously reading them for filth as the special progresses, declares that human birth and love are miracles and they need to spread the word.  Instantly the animals are all about this and run out of the manger into the dawn sunlight, yelling to the still empty town that birth is a miracle and love is a miracle, they’re all really into it.  Quickly their yells devolve into their usual barks and squawks and other animal noises and as they lose their speech they also lose their intelligence.  The ox is the last to go as he stares directly into the camera and states that although they’re losing their gift of speech they had it for one night and hopes that it’s not too late for mankind to learn the truth.  The last shot is of them wandering back to their barn.

There’s a lot to unpack here.  I guess the most obvious reading of this ending revelation is that’s it very literal, that they witnessed the birth of Jeebs and meant specifically that this was a miracle, and the ox’s comment was proselytizing in nature.  Or one could make an argument that they were being more humanist in their message, that birth and love in general are miracles and we need to think about that and be better people.  Either way this is all really undermined by the fact that the moment they learn this important lesson, whichever it is, both the ability to communicate this lesson and in fact the lesson itself are stripped from them before any humans can be told.  It really makes for a confusing moral.  This is obviously meant to be for the benefit of the viewing audience but what benefit are we supposed to actually take from it?  If it’s as simple as “be nice to each other and also believe in Jesus,” why were the animals granted superpowers?  Why were they suddenly taken away?  Is the lesson that God just likes messing with animals?

The logic underlying the most basic decisions behind this special utterly escapes me.  All they had to do was not have the animals actually talk as the humans do.  With this one simple fix the entire cascade of logical problems collapses into a simple narrative.  Having the animals act like people before the baby Jeebs inspires them to be better actually clarifies the moral immensely if you remove the human speech part.  Still have the conversation with the donkey, just have Mary and Joseph having the same conversation in the background with the innkeeper.  Instead of having them run out into the streets only to have their speech peeled from their brains just have them resolve to be nicer to each other within the barn.  The fact that the animals talk does nothing but complicate and confuse an otherwise simple reframing of the nativity story to show it from the animals’ perspective.  I am utterly baffled by the entire conceit.  I would genuinely be fascinated by a simple conversation by any of the executives involved in causing this thing to exist.